Sunday morning….6:38 a.m., and the two Alaskan Malamutes who live behind us are howling again. I’ve tried a number of things including a call to Animal Control and placing a For Sale sign on their front lawn. Given that this has been a regular disturbance for over ten years, a very young cowboy thought it prudent to invest in training. No, not the desensitization type where blatant rudeness has little effect, this schooling is cutting edge and promises to have immediate and lasting results. The program is called Owl for Hire and it’s similar to the gun for hire used in the 1960’s western TV show named Paladin that featured Richard Boone as one gun you didn’t want to mess with. The owl in this picture has been fitted with a special nest high atop a Russian olive tree in our back yard. At the first sound from the crazed canines next door, he will begin bombing raids where the unsuspecting pets are pecked unmercifully until they wished they’d never left Alaska. The cost for the training is steep. $5,000.00 could be considered excessive but it does include nest installation, food for a week, and the promise that the assassin will give the owners a thrashing if they ever wake up to see what the commotion is all about.
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