Every single child is gifted. And every single child has challenges. It’s just that in the educational system, some gifts and challenges are harder to see. And teachers are working on this problem. Lots of schools are working on ways to make all children’s gifts visible and celebrated. And as parents, we can help. We can help our kids who struggle in school believe that they’re okay. It’s just that there’s only one way to help them. And it’s hard.
We have to actually believe that our kids are okay.
I know. Tough. But it can be done.
We can start believing by erasing the idea that education is a race. It’s not. Education is like Christmas. We’re all just opening our gifts one at a time. And it is a fact that each child has a bright and shiny present with her name on it, waiting there underneath the tree. God wrapped it up and He’ll let us know when it’s time to unwrap it. In the meantime, we must believe that our children are okay.
Every last one of them.
The straight A ones and ones with autism and the naughty ones and the chunky ones and the shy ones and the loud ones and the so far behind ones.
Because here’s what I believe: a child can survive a teacher or another child suggesting that he’s not okay, as long as when he comes home, he looks at his mama and know by her face that he really is okay. Because that’s all they’re asking, isn’t it?
‘Mama, am I okay?’
In the end, the child will call the rest of the world liars and believe his mama.
So, when he asks us with his eyes and his heart if he’s okay, let’s tell him:
‘Yes baby, you are okay. You are more than okay. You are my dream come true. You are everything I’ve ever wanted and I wouldn’t trade one you for a million anybody elses. This part of life, this school part, might be hard for you. But that’s okay, because it’s just one part of life. And because we can do hard things together. We are a team. And I’m so grateful to be on your team.
And then, before we dive into helping, let’s just eat some cookies together and talk about other things. There are so many other things to talk about, really.
Let’s be Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird. Atticus’s children, Scout and Jem, carefully watch their father’s reaction as the house next door to theirs burns to the ground. As the fire creeps closer and closer to the Finches’ home, Atticus appears so calm that Scout and Jem finally decide, ‘it ain’t time to worry yet.’
We need to be Atticus. Hands in our pockets.
Calm. Believing.
So that our children will look at us and even when the fire is raging in front of them, they’ll say,’Huh. Guess it’s not time to worry yet.’
Then we’ll watch carefully. We’ll just watch and wait and believe until God nods and says,’It’s time. Tear open that gift, Mama.’
And we’ll get to say our Mama FAVE.
‘Told you so. Told you so, World.’
From the terrific book, Carry On Warrior…The Power of Embracing Your Messy Beautiful Life
By Glennon Doyle Melton
What You’re Saying